Dealing with a toxic boss can be a challenging and emotionally draining experience. Many of us encounter such situations during our careers, and finding effective strategies for coping with these challenging work environments is crucial. In this blog post, I will explore the difference between complex and toxic bosses and discuss some practical tips and personal examples to help you navigate these situations.

Understanding the Difference:

It is crucial to differentiate between a difficult boss and a toxic one. A difficult boss may have quirks and a unique management style, which can clash with your approach. However, their intentions might not be malicious. They might genuinely believe their way is the right way or struggle to understand your perspective.

On the other hand, a toxic boss is one who consistently makes your work life miserable. They drain your motivation, create an unfair environment, and may even engage in harmful behaviours such as bullying or harassment. Labelling someone as toxic should not be done lightly, as it carries significant implications.

Some personal examples of one of my toxic bosses:

1. I was expected not only to do the ward round after my night shift, but stay till mid-day to help out with ward jobs. This would leave about four hours of sleep ( that is if I don’t get calls from the juniors in the ward), before I come back for the night shift.

2. Blaming me for things that other people did when I was on my zero( off) days.

3. Trying to guilt trip me about taking my annual leave.

4. When I finally took some vacation, they would contact me, and email/text me about trivial patient matters and tried to make me feel guilty for taking time off to see my family.

5. Expect me to come on my off days /weekends for trivial tasks which were neither for service provision nor training.

6. Constantly making me feel inadequate when I asked for help with clarification of clinical matters.

7. Constant, uni-lateral criticism when I was in theatre with this supervisor, which was usually not constructive.

   Now the thing is, I wouldn’t mind taking fewer annual leaves, coming in my off days to help out. All I ever wanted was the chance to be trained to be a good surgeon!

   But when you are not being paid or being trained in your job, it is just not worth it!

   If you are in this situation, first consider whether you can change your situation. If changing your job or placement is not possible, then consider these strategies.

   Strategies for Dealing with Toxic Bosses:

   1. Know It Will End: If you're in a toxic work situation, remember that it won't last forever. Training programs and placements have finite durations.

   2. Document Everything: Keep thorough documentation of your interactions and tasks assigned by your toxic boss. This will be invaluable if you ever need to escalate the situation.

   3. Seek Support: Reach out to friends or colleagues for emotional support. Having a trusted outlet can help you maintain perspective.

   4. Set Boundaries: When possible, establish boundaries to protect your time and well-being. Toxic bosses may exploit your willingness to work long hours for their gain. If you don’t want to say it outright, make plans to go away from that place, plan a vacation or whatever. This can be a diplomatic way to decline.

   5. Maximize Learning Opportunities: Look for opportunities to learn from other supervisors or colleagues. This not only enriches your skillset but also boosts your confidence. Look for any gap, when they need assistance, running a clinic and use them to learn.

   6. Complete Your Portfolio: Focus on aspects of your professional development that are within your control, such as building a strong portfolio or excelling in other areas. If you are not getting training, then see if you can concentrate on academics and build up your CV. Get your audit/QUIPs done. This will come in handy because your supervisor can not question the evidence of all the cases, and assessments.

   7. Manage 360-Degree Feedback: Obtain feedback from multiple sources, preferably those not closely associated with your toxic supervisor. This helps provide a balanced view of your performance. Because it is unlikely you will get a fair review from them.

   8. Consider Escalation: In some cases involving harassment, discrimination, or unbearable emotional toll, you have to escalate the issue or seek external help.

      THE ULTIMATE LESSON

      The ultimate lesson from these toxic people that we can learn is exactly what we don’t want to be! All these toxic people are a product of their environment. We have to make a conscious decision not to be one of them.

      Dealing with a toxic boss can be an emotionally and professionally taxing experience. It is crucial to recognize the signs of toxicity and employ strategies to protect yourself and your career. Remember that you have options, and your well-being should always be a priority. While challenging, navigating a difficult (not toxic) work environment for a short period can ultimately make you more resilient and better equipped to handle difficult situations in the future. Always assess, what are you gaining and whether it is worth it. Take a long view. But if you continue to find it difficult, despite taking action, then perhaps it is time to consider changing the environment.

      Remember, what does not kill you, does not always make you stronger!

      Share your experiences and tips for dealing with toxic bosses in the comments; your insights may help others facing similar challenges.